>>43224
reminds me of my mom. i know the trauma goes deep. i always hide it by pretending i'm a nothing and a nobody who barely functions in society. sometimes, when i actually look, i can see the same pain in others' eyes- i know they hide it the same way i do. behind the glamorous illusion society comfortably provides, within the depths of hedonistic pleasure, which superficially masks the real pain inside. i'm at the point where up is down and down is up, and i can't find my bearings at all. all is confusion, which is a disturbing grief, tightly wrapped around my mind, constricting it and making me suffocate within myself. i know no sanctuary from the horrors of this existence. even in my dreams, i am persecuted by my conscience.
existence is not just eternal suffering, but perpetual horror for me. any chance at salvation has left me long ago. now i sit here to bear witness to cataclysmic catastrophe as old prophecies are fulfilled. my fate is sealed.