>>36364
idk magick, you seem confused about everything right now
do you tend to lose track of things? including your own train of thought? your own sense of self? your own concept of identity? do you just start mind wandering without even noticing what you're saying or thinking about, what you were even doing in the moment, you look back at yourself and question what you were even thinking, its like a different person was doing all that stuff, you werent even in control?
you mentioned taking dxm a bunch lately so maybe u were dissociated and thinking about random stuff, a thought comes to mind, you echo the words and make it into a thread, maybe it had a meaning and it was forgotten right after
maybe the thing you're missing is a piece of yourself?
have fun at the party though!